Yesterday I was watching an episode of Big Bang Theory, the one where Amy ruins Raiders of the Lost Ark for Sheldon. Sheldon unable to come to terms with the fact that Amy ruined what was one of his favorite movies come up with sinister plans to ruin something for her. He decides to ruin one of her favorite childhood movies. However, Amy stops him and simply tells him that since they are in a relationship, revenge is not an option. Sheldon should have told Amy how hurt he was and they could have talked it over.
That's a nice lesson to take away and apply in our relationships. Not only the relationships with our BF/GFs, spouse but even the ones with our friends, colleagues, siblings and most importantly, parents. Every relationship thrives on the participants' involvement in the relationship. I know we generally associate the term relationship to love, but hey, no harm in loving everyone around you. Let's not take the term literally here, because the lesson we learn will only help us become a better individual.
Your relationship with a friend need not take an ugly turn just because she did not call you on your b'day or because she went away with somebody else for a movie. Your relationship with your colleagues need not become tense just because they are doing well at work or because they are getting along better with your boss. If you can't openly express your problems, don't seek revenge silently. Instead make an effort, no matter how difficult it is, to talk to the person. If the person doesn't understand then it is not your problem. It is your problem only if you bottle up your hurt. Say it and move on, without worrying about the outcome. Because let's agree, worry about these things will take us nowhere.
I am pretty bad at relationships myself. I am being very candid about it because everybody who knows me, knows that. And when I say relationships, I mean even friendships. I get hurt very easily. And I seldom talk about it. If I get hurt, I just move away and isolate myself. But revenge? No. I don't seek revenge. What I do end up doing is, annoy the person by becoming extremely silent and closed!
I tell you, it's not done. (I told myself that) So, the point is, once you are hurt by your friend or lover or colleague, for some of us, things may change forever. We may not be the same friends anymore, we may stop sharing secrets, we may start doubting a little, we may become indifferent and so on. I know I cannot change overnight, and trust me, you CAN'T! So I decided to do this one thing - tell the person I was hurt. And then move on.
The sense of peace you get when you tell someone they hurt you and you didn't like cannot be expressed. Let's try it in our lives and see how life turns out for us!
:)
That's a nice lesson to take away and apply in our relationships. Not only the relationships with our BF/GFs, spouse but even the ones with our friends, colleagues, siblings and most importantly, parents. Every relationship thrives on the participants' involvement in the relationship. I know we generally associate the term relationship to love, but hey, no harm in loving everyone around you. Let's not take the term literally here, because the lesson we learn will only help us become a better individual.
Your relationship with a friend need not take an ugly turn just because she did not call you on your b'day or because she went away with somebody else for a movie. Your relationship with your colleagues need not become tense just because they are doing well at work or because they are getting along better with your boss. If you can't openly express your problems, don't seek revenge silently. Instead make an effort, no matter how difficult it is, to talk to the person. If the person doesn't understand then it is not your problem. It is your problem only if you bottle up your hurt. Say it and move on, without worrying about the outcome. Because let's agree, worry about these things will take us nowhere.
I am pretty bad at relationships myself. I am being very candid about it because everybody who knows me, knows that. And when I say relationships, I mean even friendships. I get hurt very easily. And I seldom talk about it. If I get hurt, I just move away and isolate myself. But revenge? No. I don't seek revenge. What I do end up doing is, annoy the person by becoming extremely silent and closed!
I tell you, it's not done. (I told myself that) So, the point is, once you are hurt by your friend or lover or colleague, for some of us, things may change forever. We may not be the same friends anymore, we may stop sharing secrets, we may start doubting a little, we may become indifferent and so on. I know I cannot change overnight, and trust me, you CAN'T! So I decided to do this one thing - tell the person I was hurt. And then move on.
The sense of peace you get when you tell someone they hurt you and you didn't like cannot be expressed. Let's try it in our lives and see how life turns out for us!
:)
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